restoration day 12: a story of redemption (personal training)

remember day 4? well, i redeemed myself. i had a great workout. i’m not in bad shape after all – it really was because i didn’t eat properly.  lesson learned!  i planned to go to yoga tonight, but i left late and didn’t make it there on time. i didn’t want to be *that girl* walking in late and being disruptive. so annoying!

as this project approaches two weeks, some conflicting feelings are beginning to emerge. i’m happy about the progress that i’m making, but still feeling a little stuck and somewhat blue about being in this situation. i journaled earlier and have some perspective now. it’s mostly just me being impatient with the process. two months seemed a lot longer when i was still working!

during my journaling session, i came up with some goals for the summer:

  • get 7-8 hours of sleep. there’s a correlation between my stress levels and my poor sleep. as i became more isolated and stressed, i began to experience difficulty falling and staying asleep. the lack of sleep began to impact my ability to function during the day and i took lunesta for a few months (before the alarming studies). i also relied on unisom pm and tylenol pm before the prescription and between them. there are some common sleep hygiene suggestions – (1) using the bedroom only for sleep and sex, (2) eliminate light, (3) develop a sleep ritual/wind down, etc – some that i adhered to – some that i didn’t. i also sprayed lavender on my pillow – sometimes it seemed to work, sometimes it didn’t. i wasn’t terribly consistent. i read some very scary articles about sleeping aids (i’ll spare you the trauma) and have decided that i’m not doing that anymore – even the over the counter ones. the goal is to actually use the sleep hygiene suggestions, give myself a bedtime and begin sleeping consistently by august 1 – hopefully before!
  • read 3 books a month. this should be doable. there are lot of books that i want to read this summer, but i haven’t organized myself to start. some books are related to work, some are related to cultivating creativity and, of course, some good summer fiction. i’ll make a list after i get back from vacation and go from there.
  • lose 5-7lbs – tone up! for the record, i have a good relationship with my body. my clothes don’t fit like they used too -this is a problem, because my clothes are pretty fabulous and i can’t afford to rebuild my wardrobe. i’m sure that moving more will make all the difference and eliminating candy will be all that it takes.  i’m looking forward to doing more strength training and getting stronger.
  • go to the dentist. 
  • clean and thoroughly organize the apartment! that adage about our living environment reflecting our inner world?completely true in my case. i never really finished unpacking from the move in the fall. the game plan is to tackle one room at a time with the goal of being completely organized by july 1.
  • register car with dmv. 
  • live and blog 60 days of self-care. i am really enjoying blogging this experience. i’m already beginning to give thought to how i can continue it once i return to work. perhaps, making it into a self-care blog?
  • make 2 new friends.  it feels incredibly silly to write this and have it as a goal, but social support is incredibly unrated and immensely important.
  • run 3x week for 30 minutes – increase endurance and stamina. 
  • read book of proverbs. 
  • build a consistent meditation practice. the meditation group that i attended advocates practicing for 30 minutes, which i successfully did earlier in this project. yet, the idea of 30 minutes is a barrier. i’m moving to 15 minutes and will build from there. it’s all about setting yourself up for success.
  • give away smiles. smiling is good for the soul. i’ve read all of the studies about how smiling, even fake ones, tricks your brain into relaxing. i can get with that. i’m about to become one of those people who you see smiling for no reason:)
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